Remembering John L. Skinner

Five years ago tomorrow morning, my father passed away. It was a Sunday morning and before I was even fully awake, I knew he was gone by the tone in mom's voice. She simply said, "Josh." And I knew.

The morning was a whirlwind of activity and overwhelming emotions. When I stop to think about it I can still put myself in the house. For many months the scene replayed itself in my head in a continuous play mode. Thankfully, the more time that has passed the less the ending of my father's life has tortured me.

This holiday season, I have been thinking a lot about how to commemorate his life. For the past five years I have remembered my father on January 2, the day he went to be with the Lord. It has been more a day of mourning and grief rather than celebration and rememberance of his life. It has been appropriate for me to grieve in this way. Grief is one of the hardest human emotions--at least the hardest I have ever faced.

I think now I am ready to move toward celebration in my annual rememberance of my Father. I do still grieve over his loss. But there is so much to celebrate about my father, John Lewis Skinner.

He was a wonderful, wonderful father. Now that I am a mom I can see it even more. He always cared, always provided, and was always there. I am very blessed to have had him as my father. I am very blessed that he was present through all of my childhood. He loved my mom well. They were married just shy of 23 years. He was a hard worker. He was passionate about sports--all sports. He was very competitive and in his day very athletic. He had a heart for people. I remember him teaching Sunday School to kids and coaching baseball for my brother. He never missed a dance concert, a school assembly, a piano recital, a game I was cheering at, or anything else that was important to me. He drove the truck for my class homecoming floats every year. He taught me to drive (much to the concern of my mother, ha!). He always had a $10 bill for me so I could go out with my friends.

He was present in my life. I truly miss his presence. He had a way of making me feel loved just by being around him.

Here is my mom & dad at their Senior Prom, I think in 1981. They were High School sweethearts!

Here is a picture of one of my favorite memories with him. Just a few weeks before he died, it snowed in Carlsbad. I was home on Christmas break from college. My dad, brother and I decided to get in the hot tub and watch the snow come down. It was a nice morning.
It breaks my heart that my dad didn't get to meet my husband. And with Hunter's birth I have missed him more than ever. He would have been so excited to meet his grandson. Hunter will be wearing his Cubs hoodie from his Grandma Frances tomorrow in rememberance of his Grandfather John.

I love you, Dad. You will always be remembered in my heart!